Ben Reifel was a good friend. Almost all of his acquaintances thought of him as a friend. The Reverend Mary Husby, a close personal acquaintance and friend, stated that Ben Reifel had a certain quality, a warmth, sincerity and self-effacement that made all persons feel close to and trust in him.
For the five and a half years that I knew Ben he was always ready to support, to serve, to offer advice or simply to listen. He was one of the most generous persons that I have ever known; generous with his time, commitments, money, talent and influence. Ben had that wonderful knack of knowing intuitively the right time “to stop by” or “give a call” or to check on “things in the Diocese.” His friendship was demonstrated in small ways, the unexpected note, card or gift at the appropriate time. As a friend, Ben had that sense of knowing another’s need, the willingness to reach out and care.
Ben was a friend to the “state of South Dakota. In an article entitled, “Transitional Sioux
Leaders; Benjamin Reifel,” John S. Painter states that Ben: “should be remembered best for his contributions in facilitating tribal adjustments to twentieth-century conditions and for his continuous efforts to promote intercultural understanding. With personal experience, advanced education, administrative skill, and communicative acumen, he educated all who would listen. Reifel was successful at every turn in his career because he transcended the problems of the past and present to address the needs of the future with deep bicultural understanding emanating from his own dual cultural heritage.”
Ben’s friendship and love for South Dakota is perhaps best embodied in his two names. The name Reifel connected Ben with his German heritage and the pioneer spirit of those early immigrants who came to South Dakota to take up the challenge of building a new life and cultivating a hard and, at times, harsh land. Ben’s Lakota name, Wiyaka Wanjila (Lone Feather), connected him with his deep roots in Lakota culture and history and his heritage and home on the Rosebud Reservation. Ben’s mother, Lucy Burning Breast, taught him the ways and language of the Lakota people.
As a mixture of both western European and Lakota cultures, Ben embodied South Dakota in its diversity and bi-cultural make-up. As such, he was able to see the best in each culture and live that best to its fullest. Perhaps, even more importantly, he was able to be critical of those destructive aspects of both cultures, to address them and to spend his life attempting to correct them. Ben was a friend of South Dakota as a reconciler. He was a reconciler because he knew both cultures and could share and teach the riches of each. For example Ben once said, “The Indians have lived in harmony with nature for centuries while the whites seemed dedicated to conquering it.”
In calling for respect for the land, family and neighbors, selflessness and artistic expression born of his Lakota ancestry, Ben also called his Indian brothers and sisters to take advantage of education and learn the best that non-Indian culture had to offer, “just as the Norwegians and South Dakota’s other ethnic groups have continued to practice their craft and preserve the foods, the Native American should continue their dances and art. . . but anyone who wants to get into the mainstream is going to have to learn the work-time-saving elements.”
Ben was a friend to and of South Dakota. His love for his people, the land, the state of South Dakota, can be seen in the many awards, honors and organizations that recount his dedicated service and unselfish willingness to share the beauty and diversity of South Dakota. Such interest ranged from the support of the Boy Scouts to helping bring the EROS Data Center to South Dakota. As the first Indian from South Dakota to be elected to the United States Congress, Ben was tireless in advocating, crafting and supporting legislation for the benefit of the people of South Dakota.
Ben was a friend to the Church. To know Ben was to know a committed Christian and a devout Episcopalian. His friendship and love for the Church stemmed from a very early age and are evident in the service and ministry that was his from his early years of teaching in an Episcopal School on the Rosebud to his role as chairman of the laity in our T.I.M.E. fund raising drive. Ben gave of his time, his talent, his money and his wisdom in helping the Church in this Diocese grow and mature as the Church which stands for and embodies reconciliation.
Ben’s deep faith and his profound reverence for all creation and all people equipped hum to serve as an agent of reconciliation with an abiding commitment to justice, peace and sharing of the best of both cultures wherein all persons grow and are enriched by the uniqueness of one another. In Christian terms we call such sharing the ministry of reconciliation. It can also be seen as an abiding friendship.
And so we say farewell to a friend. An important part of friendship is remembering. In remembering the virtues and qualities of Ben, we honor his memory best by sharing in the ministry of reconciliation.
The Church is filled with saints from the past and present. As a friend of the Church and as a friend of the state, Ben is clearly one of those contemporary saints. In saying farewell I hereby declare the birth date of Benjamin Reifel, September 19th, to be a day in which we remember Ben in prayer in our Diocesan Prayer Cycle as a witness to the meaning of what it is to be a reconciler in our day and in our time. In his homily at Ben’s burial, the Venerable Noah Brokenleg said this about Ben’s witness as a friend; “Serving as a witness clarifies understanding, Serving as a witness deepens dedication. Serving as a witness brings the reward of seeing results.”
In such witness and friendship we shall remember Ben as we wish him farewell.